Saturday, October 11, 2008

Really?

Dear Background Checkers/Drug Testers:

Hi there. My name is Meredith Evans and I was ready in May to start my new job. I understand the importance of background checks and drug tests. I think it is a good thing to know as an employer if your future employee is a drug addict or a serial killer. From the documentation provided, you see that I am 22 years-old. My background consists of living in two different places and a couple of credit cards. There is also a lack of violence, I tend to be a peaceful person. My dependence on drugs or alcohol is zero, as my drug test will feature.

So why is that it's been over a week since all this information was submitted and yet, I STILL can't start my job?

When you have an answer, please respond accordingly. And hurry: I may have to start a dependence on drugs to get me through the next few days of not being able to work.

Sincerely,
"Employed-But-Not-Working-And-Would-Like-To-Know-When-I-Can-Start" Meredith Evans

3 comments:

Mom said...

Shut up! Are you serious? Hang in there! Remember, good things come to those who wait...

Amanda said...

Hang in there girl! Keep your eye on the prize my love...

Moms friend Sally said...

I am so glad you allow comments now! It makes me feel like I am keeping in touch rather than being a voyeur! Your impatience is a good sign (regrettably bureaucracy has no urgency. . . .)